If you are burned out, you may need to plan your exit strategy

I remember my first real experience with burnout. I owned and operated a small restaurant just West of Boston in one of the wealthiest communities in the state. I had been in the restaurant business for over 16 years and as anyone will tell you, dealing with the public for that long can be a punishing experience for your mental health.

I remember the day it finally dawned on me that I had enough of this lifestyle.

It was the dead of winter and a rash of employees had called in sick on me for two straight days. Aside from some help in the dish room, I was pretty much on my own. Around 5:00 PM the second day, I developed an epic Nosebleed.

Thankfully, nobody was in the restaurant, and I was able to lock the door before any other customers came in. If you work in the restaurant business, then you know most people would not give a shit if you are bleeding to death or not. They just want you to be open. And if they saw you through the window, they would bang on the door until you opened it.

I probably should have called 911 but instead, I sat down in the back room and tried to stop the nosebleed. And because I was running a franchise and was under contract, as soon as I was able to control myself, I unlocked the door for customers and began serving again.

After 16 long years of crazy hours in the restaurant business, being treated like crap and in many cases a second-class citizen, and cleaning up after other humans, it was clear I could not stay in this business.

I was mentally exhausted, physically tired, and very cynical about other human beings. The thought of another full restaurant and a line of people waiting to be served made me shake.

It was time to create an exit plan.

I regrouped, got my head together, and got hyper-focused on my end goal which was walking out of that restaurant forever. I cut payroll, worked even longer hours with fewer employees, and stuffed as much money as I could in the bank.

When I got close to the end of my contract with the franchisor, I sold the location back to the company.

I walked away and never looked back. And I never spent another day in any type of hospitality role.

I joke with my friends sometimes that when we’re in a restaurant and I see a stressed-out manager with his shirt untucked, his tie stuffed in his upper pocket and it looks like he is sweating to death, I begin to have flashbacks and it actually stresses me out. But it really is no joke. It brings me back to the days where I felt I had no way out.

And the manager I see running his ass off might feel he is stuck in this lifestyle as well. And that makes me sad.

Burnout doesn’t always mean you need a long weekend.

Burnout can be crushing, and it can stop you in your tracks. It can force you to take a hard look at your life and make drastic changes. The thought of spending the next 30 plus years of my life waiting on others and cleaning up half-eaten food made me decide that I needed a completely different lifestyle and way of making a living. Staying in the hospitality business would ultimately kill me.

Are you burned out?

In my restaurant years and later in life running a public relations agency, I would casually say to myself, “Man am I burned out.” But I said it nonchalantly not thinking that it was becoming a major problem for my life. But it was becoming an issue.

If you feel you are suffering from burnout, ask yourself these questions.

Is my workload too much, or am I dissatisfied with the work I’m doing?

Do I still like what I do for a career? Would I be happier doing something else?

Am I always tired and feel like I can never catch up on sleep?

Am I becoming cynical about customers, clients, and coworkers?

Is my mental and physical health suffering?

Do I just need a vacation, or am I done!?

Do I let others around me run my life and have I set the proper boundaries?

Do I have trouble saying no to others?

If you feel you are suffering from burnout, it is time for some radical self-awareness. You need to look inward, be honest with yourself and make the necessary and critical changes to get your life back on track and be happy with your choices.

Real burnout can turn your life into a train wreck so it’s important to know the signs and ask yourself the tough questions.

David Greenwood is the author of Overcoming Distractions-Thriving with Adult ADHD and Overcoming Burnout, being published in fall 2021.